Health Update (super original title)

This is just a health update! first some stressful/negative point form notes yay lol then some explanation and a bit of good news too.

Things I already knew:
- I have hyothyroidism
- I have Intracranial Hypertension
- My iron is low
- I need to lose weight in order to fix the second one (which is difficult with the first one and being an emotional eater)

Things that I now know after numerous doctor appointments:
- All the above are still accurate
- I've now been diagnosed with chronic anemia
- my spleen is enlarged
- my liver is enlarged, and not working well
- there are fatty deposits on my liver but no lesions (so no wound, ulcer, abscess or tumor)
- my blood is breaking down too quickly; my blood cells are not living as long as they should.
- i have an upcoming ultrasound to check for uterus cysts and to check my ovaries.
- the reason my face has been going numb could be because of the low iron or anxiety attacks; I am leaning toward a combo but it definitely seemed anxiety related (this is a new level of anxiety for me.. that's a whole 'nother blog post)

My doctor thinks most of these things are caused by the low iron and the hypothyroidism. She is hoping that by taking iron, losing weight and continuing my current dosage of meds that my body should figure itself out for the most part.

She is referring me to an Internal Medicine Doctor and testing me for some autoimmune diseases. Hopefully that's just to rule out the major things. They also want to figure out why my liver is enlarged.

To say I'm a bit freaked out would be accurate. I don't enjoy going to the doctor or having blood tests done and it's basically all I've done the last couple of weeks, with more to come. I just want to be better and to be healthy. I want to focus on my family and enjoy my motherhood. I want to go to the doctor and hear some good news.

But most of all, i just want to be at peace.. not matter what the circumstances. Working on that through prayer and some very real conversations with the Father today. <3

My symptoms are all over the map. Exhaustion, muscle spasms, sharp pains, liver pain, nausea, headaches, anger, hot flashes, chills, mood swings, anxiety attacks, 16 day periods, did i mention exhaustion? lol
HOWEVER.. I have been working on myself. About 1.5 weeks before my appointment that told me all of these things (around Aug 16), I noticed a shift. I have mostly stopped stress eating. My exercises and advice from my counselor were working without me noticing. We then went on a week long trip with gas station food and fast food.. then came home and it was chaos and kids and dr appts and now it's today. And somehow I've only stress eaten three times in the last month. This is insane for me. And one time was with an apple so it was great for me ha I have lost 9 pounds and my mind and my insides already feel better.

I have been drinking iron right out of the bottle and taking multivitamins, vitamin D and a liver cleanse pill. I can actually get out of bed in the morning almost right away and when the kids go down for a nap I don't sit the entire time. Things are changing for me.. it feels like in the right direction.

This makes my thought processes a little more complicated as I am noticing some improvements but know that I still have impending specialist, ultrasound and blood test appointments. I'm anxious but I'm hopeful. I'm afraid but I feel like maybe I don't need to be or maybe I should be more. It's confusing guys. lol

I'm basically just updating you all as a number of people have been asking me lately how I've been doing. And it actually feels good to have it all typed out instead of just thinking it all and having it fly around my head.

In order to be able to stay off medication for the pressure surrounding my brain, I have to lose another 17 pounds by the beginning of December . Those pills are something I never want to be on again due to the side effects I felt after using them for only 6 days. I have noticed a shift in how quickly I'm losing weight and it's definitely a mix of the fact that I'm eating healthier options (altho I've done this before with almost no results) and no stress eating and my blood tests showed that for the first time my thyroid levels are perfect (on medication, so we got my dose right this time yay!). I am extremely grateful for this. The rest is up to me and I finally feel like I'm doing my part. The rest of the rest is up to my body and Jesus.

I would 100% love to ask you for your prayers. Specifically that I am able to have the energy to keep on working on myself, that I will be able to keep the fear and anxiety under control and of course for healing. Thanks for being with me.

I am still tired. But I am moving forward.
<3
love you guys.

Birthday Adventures

FILM! 

I get so excited about it every time. We've had a bit of a busy last while, hence the reason these pictures are from March haha oops. BUT this was a milestone for me as I was really happy that I remembered some of the tips my sister taught me (check her out here: Carrie Lynn Unger Photography) #shamelessadvertising .. and applied them. Most of these pictures actually turned out how I was imagining they would! ACK! personal win! ha 

We had a full 2 day, 1 night weekend together in March for both of our birthdays. My birthday is in December so we were a bit late but I mean, twin babies. That's always why. ha It was thee perfect weekend; we each planned a day for the other and we hit the nail on the head. We actually ended up both planning surprise drinks with all of her friends (they're also my precious winnipeg friends hehe) for each night for each other LOL they kept both secrets well and were good sports with spending both evenings with us haha it was a blast :) 

here is our adventure

Breakfast  

quick photoshoot on top of the hotel - cost us another $2 in parking haha worth it.

I conquered a lot of fears to get here; elevators, heights & parkades. It was a rough few minutes man

hotel view - we were blessed with a free night :') it was magical.

a morning swim

tattoo: a jack pine that I drew from the street we grew up on together. I have the same one on my arm <3

tattoo: perfect love casts out all fear 

supper

I took her to this stunning greenhouse (thanks to a friend for the suggestion)

I wish I didn't kill plants :'( I want them all.

We took a look at Pepo Ceramics and lot.15 <3

PERSONAL FAVES - I MEAN, LOOK AT THE GOLD

and finally got a tour of our cousin's business! He creates and hand makes beautiful clothing: Commonwealth Mfg

on my bucket list; climb a fire escape. again with the heights but I did it!

MORE GREENHOUSE

She found a plant baby :)

we just cannot resist mirror selfies

she took me to the CONSERVATORY :') it was perfect.

pure magic.

also, cutest model alert

I shot black & white film for my first time! I have quite a bit to learn but i LOVED it. 

it makes everything look like a totally different world

CACTI!

It was the most perfect weekend and I want to go back, all the time :) 

Love you sister shrub.

<3

Ps. I am always open to tips/critique/advice for film! I do the very basics right now ha Also, location suggestions! Preferably outdoors or abandoned hehe